The apartment in White Rock is well and truly sold! The new owner took possession last week. After wondering if it was ever going to sell, and having the requisite 'get your hopes up moments', it finally sold. Lots of smoke and finally a fire. After months of trying to sell it, in the end, the closing date happened pretty quickly. It feels a bit strange for it to be gone. There were lots of happy memories, but in the later years, many more sad memories. It's sad to say goodbye, but we must keep moving forward in this journey, whatever that may be. A big thank you to our real estate agent and his team for their tireless efforts in selling the place... from showings, to email updates, to phone calls... we really could not have done it without you!
However, the drama doesn't end there. In a another twist, 25% of the proceeds of the sale have been held back by the Canadian government until we issue the necessary documentation deeming the residence to be dad's primary residence. Dad is now a non-resident, hence the government stepping in for a piece of the action. (Not sure there was anyway around this... was not able to sell dad's place while he was living in it for obvious reasons.) We were put on to a tax accountant specializing in foreign clients. I emailed him the necessary paperwork to get the ball rolling. What did I get in return? An automated response saying that he was away on his annual two week holiday. No mention to me that he would be out of town for two whole weeks. While dad's nursing home waits for the bond money, racking up hundreds of dollars in interest as we wait. Well, what was I expecting... everything wrapped up neat and tidy and topped with a bow!?
In addition to my infinite medical knowledge, property expertise and financial planning, I can now add international banking to my 'Skills-I-Never-Knew-I-Would-Acquire' list. I am on first name basis with bank officers in two countries, and am learning the ins and outs of swift codes and foreign exchange rates. Needless to say, it's a bit of a worry, transferring multiple amounts of money overseas. I will be glad when it is complete.
On the dad side of things; he seems to have recovered from his chest infection. So glad he is under medical supervision... while it is a worry, at least it's not the "I can't breathe, I'm so so worried and am about to have another panic attack" worry of the past. Must mean we have made some progress! One thing dad hasn't lost is his sense of humor! Always when dad got a hair cut, we would remark about him having a hair cut... and he would always say, "Yes, the hair just over my left ear." Oh, hahaha. Last week I noticed that he had a haircut, so repeated his joke to him. He had a big smile on his face. I took it one further and said, "You've had your ears lowered." Oh dear, we laughed. ;)
I will leave you with a quote I came across this past week ;) I think someone wrote it with me in mind ... Don't let the sadness of the past, or the fear of the future, rob the happiness of the present.
Monday, May 28, 2012
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
I Am Exhausted
I'm exhausted.
As in, drop to my knees, slump over on my face, exhausted. I know I am sometimes onsidered a drama queen. But caring for a sick relative for 3 1/2 years will make you slightly batty. This is why we take it a day at a time ... if someone had told me 3 1/2 years ago this would still be going on, I would have bolted. Because that solves every problem.
I was so excited to have filed our Canadian taxes as of Apr 30. It had been ongoing for over two months... starting with the arrival of our shipment and sorting through file boxes for paperwork for the 2011 taxes. (There was no room in our carry on baggage for everything.) The relief was immense... but didn't last very long.
We have been trying to sell dad's property in Canada for quite some time. Learned some truths along the way... Was often told that the assessed price of a property was just a number to base property taxes on and you'd make more money off the property. Myth! Was also told that property always gains value. Another myth! Was thinking how ironic it was that when mom and dad went to buy their new place, everything was sold out. They actually got lucky and got their place in a fire sale. Literally... the sale for their apartment fell through with the original buyer because he ended up with a fire on his property and couldn't buy the apartment. When mom and I walked through the showroom, we happened to overhear that a unit had come back on the market that morning. We swooped in and picked it up. (They had to move as mom had listed their large house for sale, knowing she couldn't manage it and dad with his disease.) So the apartment that everyone had to have back in it's marketing heyday... we could now hardly get rid of it. So many lookers, but no bites.
In the process, we learned that there are further issues to deal with in the process of selling property once you've moved out of the country. That, complicated with the fact that dad cannot manage his own affairs, means more paperwork. Endless paperwork. Files to go through, copies to be made, emails to be sent, coordination of professionals in Canada and Australia.
A while ago, I made a dramatic Facebook update saying that the next time I have a brilliant idea, such as moving an ill father overseas, talk me out of it.' Let me explain... the sheer volume of paperwork is threatening to drown me. I would have had enough to do, moving dad into care in Canada. Let alone moving him overseas and setting up a new life.
I had the worst headache in my life last week... at some points, I had to cradle my head in my hands, the pain has been so great. Is it any wonder... I can't switch my brain off. It has been computing non-stop... running numbers, locating files, organizing, scheduling, over and over and over again.
When yet another piece of mail arrived on my desk requesting more information... more gathering of information, copies, mailing... that I filed it in the 'Too Hard' pile. I've had enough of paperwork for the moment. Because putting your head in the sand solves everything!
I stopped in at dad's last Friday afternoon, with some new clothes and a treat... thinking we could share it out in the garden in the sunshine. As I was signing the clothes in, a nurse found me. She said my name, I turned to her and I saw 'The Look.' Oh no. What now. I think those were my words.
'Your dad has a chest infection. I've been meaning to call you. The doctor saw him yesterday and put him on antibiotics. I didn't want to worry you.'
Worry me?! Why not. It's what I do best. If I've learned anything out of this experience, it's to worry. Because that solves everything.
The last time dad had a chest infection, he was at the hospital awaiting hip surgery. It was postponed while they waited for the infection to clear. We were told to expect the worst... that chest infections in Parkinson's patients can complicate things. I spent the day wandering around the city in a daze, wondering how people could go about their lives as ours continued to crumble. He pulled through that infection though ... and went on to have a successful surgery. So far he's managed with the antibiotics with this chest infection. I plan on seeing him again tomorrow, so will see how he is faring.
And that is life with Parkinson's.
As in, drop to my knees, slump over on my face, exhausted. I know I am sometimes onsidered a drama queen. But caring for a sick relative for 3 1/2 years will make you slightly batty. This is why we take it a day at a time ... if someone had told me 3 1/2 years ago this would still be going on, I would have bolted. Because that solves every problem.
I was so excited to have filed our Canadian taxes as of Apr 30. It had been ongoing for over two months... starting with the arrival of our shipment and sorting through file boxes for paperwork for the 2011 taxes. (There was no room in our carry on baggage for everything.) The relief was immense... but didn't last very long.
We have been trying to sell dad's property in Canada for quite some time. Learned some truths along the way... Was often told that the assessed price of a property was just a number to base property taxes on and you'd make more money off the property. Myth! Was also told that property always gains value. Another myth! Was thinking how ironic it was that when mom and dad went to buy their new place, everything was sold out. They actually got lucky and got their place in a fire sale. Literally... the sale for their apartment fell through with the original buyer because he ended up with a fire on his property and couldn't buy the apartment. When mom and I walked through the showroom, we happened to overhear that a unit had come back on the market that morning. We swooped in and picked it up. (They had to move as mom had listed their large house for sale, knowing she couldn't manage it and dad with his disease.) So the apartment that everyone had to have back in it's marketing heyday... we could now hardly get rid of it. So many lookers, but no bites.
In the process, we learned that there are further issues to deal with in the process of selling property once you've moved out of the country. That, complicated with the fact that dad cannot manage his own affairs, means more paperwork. Endless paperwork. Files to go through, copies to be made, emails to be sent, coordination of professionals in Canada and Australia.
A while ago, I made a dramatic Facebook update saying that the next time I have a brilliant idea, such as moving an ill father overseas, talk me out of it.' Let me explain... the sheer volume of paperwork is threatening to drown me. I would have had enough to do, moving dad into care in Canada. Let alone moving him overseas and setting up a new life.
I had the worst headache in my life last week... at some points, I had to cradle my head in my hands, the pain has been so great. Is it any wonder... I can't switch my brain off. It has been computing non-stop... running numbers, locating files, organizing, scheduling, over and over and over again.
When yet another piece of mail arrived on my desk requesting more information... more gathering of information, copies, mailing... that I filed it in the 'Too Hard' pile. I've had enough of paperwork for the moment. Because putting your head in the sand solves everything!
I stopped in at dad's last Friday afternoon, with some new clothes and a treat... thinking we could share it out in the garden in the sunshine. As I was signing the clothes in, a nurse found me. She said my name, I turned to her and I saw 'The Look.' Oh no. What now. I think those were my words.
'Your dad has a chest infection. I've been meaning to call you. The doctor saw him yesterday and put him on antibiotics. I didn't want to worry you.'
Worry me?! Why not. It's what I do best. If I've learned anything out of this experience, it's to worry. Because that solves everything.
The last time dad had a chest infection, he was at the hospital awaiting hip surgery. It was postponed while they waited for the infection to clear. We were told to expect the worst... that chest infections in Parkinson's patients can complicate things. I spent the day wandering around the city in a daze, wondering how people could go about their lives as ours continued to crumble. He pulled through that infection though ... and went on to have a successful surgery. So far he's managed with the antibiotics with this chest infection. I plan on seeing him again tomorrow, so will see how he is faring.
And that is life with Parkinson's.
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
Remembering May 2nd
It's hard to believe that four years have passed since we last celebrated mom's (mum's) birthday. No doubt there are a few of you who have been remembering her today. May was the month that was all about mom... birthday, then Mother's Day, then their anniversary. I don't think I will ever get used to how quiet May is now. I am thankful that we always marked family birthday's with at least a dinner and a birthday cake.
Life should be celebrated. Not just for birthday's, but every day. I remember calling mom and asking her if she wanted to meet for lunch or coffee... before I had even finished asking the question, she would ask where! Always when we were out, we'd have to get a treat, or have a cup of tea. Indeed, we were always wondering where the next treat would be! We have to at least take a moment in each day to enjoy life; whether it be a cup of tea, a walk in the sunshine, pause to read a few pages of something, sitting still and watching the world pass by.
This is something I have been thinking about lately, and have been trying to take the time to really appreciate life, because it really does pass by so fast. I cannot believe it is the beginning of May already! We have been in Australia six months to the day. I did not realize it would take so long to sort out dad's affairs. There is still quite a bit left to do, but I think of how far we come, and how lucky we have been in many regards. And isn't that something to celebrate!?
Life should be celebrated. Not just for birthday's, but every day. I remember calling mom and asking her if she wanted to meet for lunch or coffee... before I had even finished asking the question, she would ask where! Always when we were out, we'd have to get a treat, or have a cup of tea. Indeed, we were always wondering where the next treat would be! We have to at least take a moment in each day to enjoy life; whether it be a cup of tea, a walk in the sunshine, pause to read a few pages of something, sitting still and watching the world pass by.
This is something I have been thinking about lately, and have been trying to take the time to really appreciate life, because it really does pass by so fast. I cannot believe it is the beginning of May already! We have been in Australia six months to the day. I did not realize it would take so long to sort out dad's affairs. There is still quite a bit left to do, but I think of how far we come, and how lucky we have been in many regards. And isn't that something to celebrate!?
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