Empty Nest

There are books written on what to expect when you are expecting, and how to toilet train your dragon (or something like that). There are books written on raising teenagers, and other books written on coping with the loss of a parent. Where are the books on how to tell your parent that they probably will not be going back home?

I arrived at the hospital to find dad sitting up in a wheelchair - AWAKE! - and dressed. He said to me, "Have you come to take me home?" THUD... there's the sound of my heart dropping again. You would think I would be used to the sound by now... but each time, it's like the first time it has happened. What can you say to that... he has had a fall, he is not yet up and walking again, there will be weeks of physical therapy ahead, and he cannot live on his own again. All I said was, "Not today, you have to be able to get up and walk around."

Little does he know that his house has pretty much been emptied. You would think I would get some perverse joy out of it... moving him against his will, after all the times he moved me against my will!! The daughter of a builder; our family moved fairly often. Being one strongly opposed to change, I did not cope well with walking home from school only to see a 'For Sale' sign on our front lawn. I cried and cried and said that I was not moving, I would stay in the house with the new owners. Not wanting strangers to raise his daughter, dad promised a vanity in my room... complete with sink, mirrors and lights running down the sides. Oh yes... I got the full on movie star dressing corner in my bedroom. Spoiled? Perhaps. However, dad also clued into the fact that he had a teenaged daughter with two younger brothers. It did curb a lot of door pounding. I was free to French braid my hair, interuption free... or whatever it was I used to do in front of that mirror. I do know a curling iron was also involved!

I digress...

I think the best option at this point is to chicken out! I don't think he is ready to hear that his apartment has been cleaned out and is ready to go on the market. Don't get me wrong, he has been included in every step of the process. He has seen the furniture being moved out, boxes packed and knows what the next step is. Not that he is in agreement with it as there is nothing wrong with him, he wants to continue to live there! (His words, not mine!) I've done all I can to prepare him for the next step, I cannot make him accept it. So for now, I'm just going to wait. Why do today what you can put off until tomorrow!?