Settling In

Thursday, November 3, 2011

When I stopped by to see dad in the morning, he was sitting in the activities room, flipping through a newspaper.  I was so happy for him... all the things we take for granted in a day... and he wasn't able to do much of anything, sitting in the hospital in White Rock.  In respite care, there are all sorts of activities organized to keep their minds active... and so they don't fall asleep all day and party all night long!

The care aides and physio therapists were talking to me and asking about our story... why we moved to Australia,, etc.  Wanted to know my relationship status... when I told them I was single, they got excited and said that I'd be able to get a boyfriend (cuz it is as easy as going to the shops and ordering one!) ... and I thought to myself... oh, can I just stay with dad a while longer - might be easier!

As silly as this sounds, I am going to have to learn to let go of dad.  I've been a helicopter daughter for so long, I'm going to have to let go.  This is the first time in the whole experience where I've been given reverse reassurance.  Instead of me worrying about dad, the nursing staff is telling me not to worry about him, and that I have my own life to live.  I've known this all along, which is why we have made the move.  Still, I will need to let go a little and trust that dad is well cared for.  There is still a long way to go in getting him permanently settled, but a huge frantic weight has already been lifted.  Not entirely removed, as I'm still working on getting paperwork from Canada (another painful extraction)... but at least I do not have the painfully sick panic I had before when he was on his own, and then in hospital.